


Stress Baking and Other Stories

by Small_Hobbit



Category: Richard III - Shakespeare, Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle, Spooks | MI-5, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), Winnie-the-Pooh - A. A. Milne, Дядя Ваня - Анто́н Па́влович Че́хов | Uncle Vanya - Anton Chekhov
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:34:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 2,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24754030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Hobbit/pseuds/Small_Hobbit
Summary: Cotton Candy Bingo stories of fluff, unlikely crossovers and general silliness
Relationships: Adam Carter/Lucas North, Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Comments: 44
Kudos: 11
Collections: Allbingo





	1. Stress Baking

**Author's Note:**

> First prompt: Stranded (Lucas & John Watson)

“What am I going to do?” Lucas North looked round in a panic. “I’m stranded here, in this cottage and I can’t get away.”

“Our friends will be able to reach us in a few days,” Dr Watson said quietly. “This is only a temporary situation, and we have everything we need until they arrive.”

“I suppose so,” Lucas agreed. He sat down and then leapt up again. “It’s just I don’t like feeling trapped.”

“Then perhaps we should find something to take your mind off it. What do you like doing?”

“Reading. Visiting art galleries. Eating cake.”

“Maybe you could try baking then.” Watson opened various cupboards and added, “There’s plenty of ingredients here you could use. There’s even a cookbook with cake recipes from basic fruit scones up to a wedding cake.”

“I’ll have a look.”

That evening, Lucas made fruit scones, fruit buns and, having found the supply of drinking chocolate, chocolate buns.

Dr Watson was delighted Lucas seemed so much calmer. 

The following day, Lucas announced he was ready to move onto cakes, and made a Victoria sandwich, and an easy fruit cake in the morning. The afternoon saw a coffee and walnut cake make an appearance, followed by an apple and sultana cake in the evening.

Dr Watson declared himself very impressed.

The next day Lucas decided he would bake and ice the cakes as well. The initial butterfly buns were a great success. This was followed by a marble cake with mocha icing. And, finally, a triple tier chocolate cake with chocolate butter icing between the layers and covered in melted chocolate.

Dr Watson was grateful they should be able to leave the cottage the following morning.

He was even more grateful to the rescue party when they arrived promptly, and Lucas practically fell into Adam Carter’s arms. Watson and Holmes, of course, simply exchanged a manly handshake.


	2. The Antiques Shop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas and Adam are in an antiques shop, where Lucas makes a surprise discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Heirloom/Antique
> 
> My thanks to okapi for the suggestion

Lucas and Adam were looking around inside the antique shop when the proprietor came over to join them.

“Is there anything in particular you’re interested in?” the man asked.

“Actually, yes, there is,” Lucas replied. He walked over to the other side of the shop, the proprietor following him.

Taken by surprise, Adam nevertheless used the opportunity presented by Lucas haggling over the price of a painting to surreptitiously slide a bugging device under the sales desk, before wandering over to join them as Lucas successfully sealed the bargain.

After they left the shop, Adam said, “I’m surprised you went for that painting, I thought we were supposed to settle on something cheaper and more within Harry’s budget.”

Lucas grinned, but said no more about it, until, as Adam had anticipated, Harry complained about the price.

“Actually, I was rather hoping I could keep the painting,” Lucas said.

Harry shrugged. “Pay what it cost and it’s yours,” he said.

Lucas carefully carried the painting back home.

There, Adam said, “Where do you want to hang your new acquisition? Although to be honest it doesn’t greatly appeal.”

Lucas laughed. “I’m not hanging this. It’s a cheap reproduction, probably only worth about half what I paid for it.”

“Then why?”

“The frame is baroque, early eighteenth century. It’s worth at least a couple of grand. If we knew its provenance it would be double that, but I’ll settle for what I can get.”

“What will you do with the money?”

“I thought I’d treat us to a weekend away somewhere in northern Italy, which is where I suspect the frame was made.”


	3. Comatose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Follows on from 'Stress Baking'. Dr Watson had brought some of the cakes back to 221B.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Helping
> 
> A drabble for whocares who inspired this!

It was a few days after Dr Watson had been rescued from the cottage where he had been stranded with Lucas.

“Watson,” Holmes called out, “Do you know anything about that?”

Watson came over to see what Holmes was pointing at. “That’s the Ferret,” he said. “It’s not unusual to see him here.”

“Yes, I do know that,” Holmes sighed. “But he appears to be comatose, which is rather unusual.”

“Well, as you know, I brought back some of the cakes Lucas had made while we were stuck in the cottage. The Ferret was simply helping me out with them.”


	4. Decision Making

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Bilbo Baggins writes to Dr Watson, and gets advice from Winnie-the-Pooh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Packing
> 
> Based on a combination of suggestions from moth2fic and mafief

Dear Dr Watson,

Thank you for your advice. Making a move such as the one we are both considering isn’t an easy decision. Although in some ways it isn’t hard to do because we know we will never be happy until we are with that one particular person. But at the same time, deciding what to take with us from our old life is so difficult. 

Indeed, I have started packing, in that I have begun to select which items I shall take. However, this is not an easy process, for as soon as I have three or four items together, I find I have changed my mind and need to begin again.

I trust you are having more success as you prepare to go to Sussex. Tell me, how do you decide how much of a former life you wish to take with you, and how much it is better to leave behind?

And now, I fear I am using this letter as a further excuse to procrastinate, so I must return to the task.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Your friend,

Bilbo Baggins

***

“I’m perfectly happy, you know,” Bilbo Baggins said to the small bear who was standing in front of him.

“Are you sure?” Winnie-the-Pooh asked. “Because your happy face looks rather sad to me.”

“I do want to go back to Erebor, it’s just…” He waved his arm around to indicate the cases and bags lying open around him. “I don’t know what to pack.”

“That’s easy,” Pooh replied. “Take only what you really need. Three, maybe four, possibly five jars of honey should do it.”  
 _Three jars of honey are an absolute must_  
 _Four are much better, but really they’re just_  
 _Only sufficient, for five would be best_  
 _That’s all you need, you can leave out the rest_

“You’re right!” Bilbo exclaimed. “I don’t need half of this.” He rushed around throwing articles in a case. “That’s it. I have a letter I must write and then I shall be off. Thank you so much for your help, Pooh Bear.”

Pooh bowed in acknowledge, picked up the bowler hat which had fallen off his head, and departed with a wave of his paw.

***

Once his case was fully strapped up, Bilbo sat down to write his letter.

Dear Dr Watson,

Just a brief note to say I leave for Erebor first thing tomorrow. You must write to me and let me know how your own move went. Mail can be sent to me at the address below. If you mark it c/o Balin Fundin I shall be certain to receive it.

Your very good friend,

Bilbo Baggins


	5. The Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bilbo arrives in Erebor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Cuddle
> 
> Also written for DW's 100 words 'Stranger' prompt

Dwalin knocked on the door to Thorin’s stateroom and said, “There’s a stranger in the great hall, who wants to see you.”

“Can’t someone else go?” Thorin shouted.

“No, it has to be you.”

Thorin emerged and stomped to the great hall, throwing open the door to confront whoever was intent on disturbing his morning. Then, with a shout of “Bilbo!” he ran to hug the hobbit, before announcing they would be retiring to his stateroom.

Much later, when Thorin summoned Balin to arrange some affairs of state, he found the two of them cuddled in Thorin’s chair, apparently inseparable.


	6. Glorious Summer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There can be too much sugar, so pause and have some vodka with Richard III (House of York) and Mikhail Astrov

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sunrise/Sunset
> 
> Grondfic suggested Richard III as played by Greg Hicks and Astrov (Uncle Vanya - Checkhov) as played by Richard Armitage
> 
> Title from the beginning speech of Richard III

The bar was crowded and the man in the old-fashioned tweed suit looked round for somewhere to sit. Finally, he spotted a table which only had one person sitting at it, so he made his way across the room towards it.

When the man reached the table, he realised the occupant was giving off such an aura that everyone else was steering well clear of him. Nevertheless, he asked, “Errm, is this seat taken?”

The man turned towards him and said, “No.”

“May I sit here?”

“I can’t stop you.”

“I think we’ve met somewhere before. My name’s Mikhail Astrov.”

The other man looked at Astrov coldly before saying, “Richard York.” He drained his glass and banged it down on the table.

“Can I get you another?” Astrov asked.

“Yes. Why not?” York indicated to the bartender, who poured two glasses of vodka. 

Astrov went over to pay and brought the vodka back. He raised his glass and said, “To life!”

York snorted.

“Do you feel that badly about life?” Astrov asked. “You shouldn’t. There are always possibilities, always ways forward.”

“Name one.”

“There are trees to plant for a start. The more trees we plant the better life will be.”

“Will trees make my wife love me?”

“One should look beyond the mere personal to the good of mankind as a whole.”

York finished his vodka and looked at Astrov. “Do you want another?”

Astrov drained his glass and nodded, so York beckoned to the bartender, who came over for the glasses and returned with refills. York pushed some money across the table to him.

Astrov thanked York and added, “It’s your turn to make a toast.”

“To power!” York said.

“The power to do good,” Astrov echoed.

York sneered. “That’s the trouble with you liberals, you haven’t the first idea about power.”

“But why else would one want power?”

“To obtain the things one has been denied for so long. You wouldn’t understand; you are hale and hearty. I have been scorned as a cripple all my life.”

“I may be well, but I am a doctor, and I know the pain of being unable to heal only too well.”

York snorted. “That is not real pain, that is all in your head.”

He drank deeply and Astrov copied him, then went up to the bar without asking York if he wanted more. 

Returning with two glasses, Astrov said, “To love!”

“What do you know of love?”

“I loved once, but she’s married to another.”

“So what are you going to do about the husband? I can recommend a good vintner if you need a butt of Malmsey.”

“Nothing. I have the blissful sorrow of unrequited love in my heart.”

“You would rather watch the world go past than take action. Drink up, we’ll have some more.”

This continued until finally the bartended came over. “Time to go, gents,” he said.

“Not possible,” Astrov slurred. “I didn’t arrive till sunset.”

“And now it’s sunrise and you need to leave.”

York struggled out of his chair and Astrov flung his arm around him and together the two new best friends staggered out of the door and into the dawn.


	7. A Formal Occasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What else would a well-dressed werewolf wear to a formal occasion?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Formal
> 
> Also written for DW's Drabblezone 'A Good Reason' challenge.
> 
> Werewolf!Lucas 'verse

Harry Pearce glared at the werewolf. “Why is he here?” he demanded. “And give me one good reason why he’s wearing a bow tie.”

“It’s a formal occasion,” Adam replied. “It’s a proper bow tie rather than a clip-on.”

The werewolf wagged its tail enthusiastically, being very proud of the bow tie. There was no mention of the amount of cursing which had gone into tying it correctly.

“He’s the only one who will get close enough to Kuznetsov to hear what’s being said,” Ros added.

“I concede the point, but it doesn’t mean I’m happy about it,” Harry replied.


	8. Baker Street Museum Gallery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a strange smell of smoke in the gallery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Clean
> 
> The idea is thanks to Okapi

The curator of the Baker Street Museum looked around the gallery with a bemused air. There was the faint smell of smoke, but no sign of anything smouldering or any evidence of anything whatsoever being untoward. She opened the window at the end of the gallery to get rid of the last lingering aroma of smoke and shook her head. She must be imagining it; the smoke alarms hadn’t sounded either, so clearly nothing had happened.

\---

_Earlier,_

“Mrs Hudson,” a voice called from Dr Watson’s portrait, “he’s done it again!”

There was a loud sigh from Mrs Hudson’s portrait and a broom appeared, which beat vigorously on the neighbouring painting of Sherlock Holmes.

“I blame the artist,” Dr Watson continued. “Giving him a pipe and papers was only going to lead to problems.” 

A bowler hat appeared from his portrait and covered the nearby smoke detector, thus preventing the alarm from sounding.

“It’s okay, it’s all out now,” Mrs Hudson said. “And you can stop smirking.” This was addressed to the portrait of Professor Moriarty, who was directly opposite Holmes. “And press the switch so I can clean away the ashes.”

A walking stick appeared, and the switch was held down, releasing a flap which covered a grating. The broom swept the ashes into it, the switch released, and the flap closed. No-one would be any the wiser.


	9. Entitled Stress Baking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucas is recovering, but not fully well, so what else will he do but bake?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ailing loved one
> 
> The idea was suggested by Aome.

“How’s Lucas?” Jo asked when Adam arrived on the Grid.

“He’s better today,” Adam replied. “Yesterday morning he was curled up in bed with the duvet over his head, but by the time I got home he’d reached the grumpy stage, and this morning he was keen to come in, but I told him not to.”

“Good,” Ros said. “He needs another day to get over it.”

“That’s what I said. He’s concerned about all that needs to be done. I told him we’re keeping everything under control, but he’s obviously getting worried because it sounds like he’s planning on baking.”

“That’s good, isn’t it?” Jo said.

“That depends how you look at it. I’ve already had one text saying, ‘Buy more eggs on the way home’.” Adam’s phone pinged and he checked the message, reading it out loud, “Why are there only a few cherries left?”

“Sounds like you’re getting a fruit cake,” Ros said.

“And the rest,” Adam muttered.

By the time Adam had received two more messages (‘Did you know the icing sugar was slightly past its sell-by date. I’ve had to use it anyway’ and ‘There are three half-used bags of light brown sugar but NO demerara’) he was seriously considering screaming.

“Would it help to go home?” Ros asked.

“No, I’ve worked two short days when Lucas was ill which was fair enough, but I’m not running around after his baking needs,” Adam snapped. “Sorry, Ros, that was uncalled for.”

“It’s okay, Adam, I understand.”

“It’s all right,” Malcolm called. “I’ve got it under control.”

Some time later Adam realised he hadn’t had another text. “What did you do, Malcolm? You can’t have blocked him.”

“Nothing of the sort,” Malcolm replied. “There’s a rerun of Great British Bake-Off at the moment, so I asked Mother to do a watchalong with Lucas.”

“That was kind of you,” Jo said.

“It was dual purpose. That way I don’t have to live through a blow-by-blow account over dinner!”


End file.
